If you want to know if your parents are toxic, you are in the right place. Parents are God’s best gift that a child receives. Nobody can be as important as a parent in a child’s life. In a world where everyone tries to take advantage, parents are the only precious people who stay with us and truly love us without any wrong intentions. But there are few parents who are toxic to their children. It’s not necessary that they have to be your step parent, they can be your original parents too. It’s impossible to accept the fact for a child that their parents can be toxic too. That insecure feeling of a child having toxic parents is tremendously painful. This article is going to help you identify the toxic traits in your parents.
One thing I must say before starting this article, a lot of children consider their parents to be toxic just after they don’t agree with you or they scold you or you just have a fight with them. But no, that’s not what being toxic is. Toxicity is something that can harm yourself or the other person who is trying to somewhat rely on you. If your parents are harmful to you, that’s when they are actually toxic.
So you must be thinking about how to understand whether they are actually toxic or not? I will tell you how. But for that, you must read this article till the end.
So let’s get started.
They always demand positive emotions from your side
This is obvious for any parent to demand positive emotions from their children. But that’s not a problem. The problem is when they only focus on your positive emotions and don’t let you express the negative ones. They start blaming you to different levels once you start expressing your negative feelings. Not only that, they make you feel that you are the sole reason for all the troubles and negative emotions. They never take it seriously and always tend to misjudge you for this.
Though they say that they will always be there when you suffer through mental health issues but actually they don’t stay when you need them the most. As a result, you feel afraid to speak about your depression, anxiety and failures in front of them. If they act in a terrific manner when you try to share what’s wrong going on in your head then they blame you for not being productive or positive, and that’s a very basic sign that your parents are toxic.
But still remember one thing, if you always end up with negative emotions in front of your parents, they may feel bad and scold you for your good, so that you start thinking in positive way. But if this happens on a regular basis, or almost everytime, then only you can consider them as toxic.
They are abusive – both mentally and physically
Being a child you can sometimes suffer mental or physical abuses from your parents in order to make you do your best. Not always are parents in a good mental state when they see their children getting into a wrong track, hence the end up being abusive. But that’s completely alright.
The problem occurs when this happens regularly. It actually occurs when your parents consider you to be weak and younger in the entire family and just to prove them right, they start abusing you. If they always make you feel that they are the only powerful members in the entire family, so if you don’t work according to them then they start abusing you and make you realise that you cannot get rid of them if you don’t listen to what they say and exactly do that.
They don’t give you enough privacy
Okay so there are a lot of families that are conservative from ages and privacy is a crime for them. Now if you have a conservative family and you ask your parents to give you the type of privacy that your other friends get then that’s a big problem. So for this, what I can suggest is that don’t always fight for privacy because they are not causing you trouble intentionally. Even I belong from a conservative family and I know that sometimes it becomes very difficult for us to manage to be a part of this generation. But let me tell you one thing, that they are trying their level best to gift you a better life in spite of having a huge generation gap.
Sometimes it’s essential to not give a child utmost privacy in order to keep them safe and also to check whether they are still in the right track or not.
But the problem lies when your parents hamper your privacy even after telling them several times not to do so.
For example, if you ask them to not touch your private diary where you write about everything that you want to hide from others and your parents end up reading it everytime no matter wherever you hide it.
They keep their mouth shut if you are molested by a family member
A lot of children may relate to this. This is the worst thing that a parent can ever do to their child. They just keep their mouths shut even after knowing that you are being molested by another family member in order to keep the respect of that family alive. This is a severe crime and you should never forgive your parents for being so much toxic.
These are only a few ways for you to identify whether your parents are toxic for you or not. But please don’t misjudge your parents as a toxic one just because you had a fight with them. Take time to think if they are really toxic for you or not.