Though we all know the signs of mental abuse, when it comes to actually identify them at the peak moment of getting abused, you actually forget them. Mental abuse can be of various types like someone controlling you, or trying to make you insecure, or trying to frighten you or isolate you and a lot more. And most surprisingly, an abuser can be anyone, maybe your teachers or parents or partners or boss and so on. So you see, for this reason, we often tend to overlook the fact that we are being mentally abused. But remember one thing, no one deserves mental abuse even if it is from their close ones. So today in this article I’ll talk about a few obvious signs that prove that you are actually getting abused mentally. So let’s start.
You often get humiliated and criticized
Do you often feel insecure when someone speaks harsh words to you? Does your self-esteem lower to the power of infinity when your close ones continuously criticize you? No matter how small it is, either in form of harsh words or even in form of a joke, it matters right? It totally shatters you from inside right?
Let’s look at some examples
i) Parents – Why are you so stupid Sara?
ii) Teachers – You are such a loser that you can never achieve anything in life
iii) Partner – You are my fat little sweetheart.
iv) Partner/Friends – Why do you always overreact?
v) Your Boss yelling at you
vi) Toxic Friend – Aww, achieving something like this is just not your cup of tea dear.
Example (i)
The parent is abusing Sara. Now it’s true that they care for us and that’s why they get tensed easily, thereby blaming us for our faults. But the same way, the words that they use can actually affect Sara. Again, it also depends on Sara how she would take it, after hearing such harsh words from her parents she may even choose to prove them wrong. Please don’t think that I’m trying to justify the abuse, I’m just trying to make you understand that it also depends on our mind and how we take it.
Example (ii)
The teacher is yelling at a student and almost cursing that the student can’t achieve anything in life. Again you see, teachers place always comes after our parents, and if they say something rude or harsh then that would definitely affect a student. This is also a sort of mental abuse. But again, as I said, if the student gets determined to prove the teacher wrong with their actions then ofcourse at one point of time the teacher will feel sorry for abusing them as a loser. Though proving them wrong doesn’t mean that you will repeat abuse them. You must be thinking that why I’m trying to justify the abusive acts of others. I’m doing so because I want to don’t want their abusive behaviour affect you mentally. I hope you are strong enough to handle their harsh words and get determined to prove them wrong. And to be very honest, if you are determined enough to achieve what you want in life then you don’t need to prove yourself but your actions definitely will do that for you.
Example (iii)
We see that a partner is basically abusing the other partner as fat. Though when you try to confront them regarding them same the would just say that they were just trying to make you feel cute or maybe just cracked a joke and you took it seriously. So the fact is they will blame you in the end and won’t even think that their words could have probably hurt you. So what you need to do is accept the fact that you are fat. Do you have any idea how eagerly a lot of people wait to become fat? (Me being one of them who eagerly waits because I’m get body shamed too for being skinny).
Basically, the fact is that we don’t value what we get and only complain by comparing with others. Not everyone has the same figure, right? So what’s wrong in accepting what we are and who we are? If we ourselves can’t accept what we are then how are other’s going to do the same. So you see, it’s true that it hurts when someone body shames us. But the moment you start loving yourself with what you are, with all your flaws is the moment when you will basically get hurt or affected by how other’s define you.
Just like that, for the other examples too I would like to say that you are what you believe and only you have the ability to make yourself do what you want. So never settle for less and never let other’s behaviours or words affect you. Hope you like reading this article. Thank you.
Also read:
Ways to stop bullying at school