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Signs you are Self-Harming & How to Stop

Today we are going to look more closely what self-harming and sabotaging is, and then, we would analyze how it can be stopped. We are going to tell you how exactly to get out of self-harming, or how to help someone you know who self-harms.

Unfortunately, self-harming is very common among people, it also affects people very gravely. We have an estimation of about 10% young people who self-harms, we need to highlight the fact that if you’re going through this- then you’re not alone, and you will come out of it. Self-harming is not what we think it is; it is not an attempt to suicide, self-harming could be a method people use to cope with distressing and anxiety inducing thoughts and episodes. Whatever might the reason be, if we detect that someone we know is self-harming, then we must help them in our best way possible. Therefore, self-harm should be taken seriously.

If you are self-harming to cope with stressful and upsetting thoughts and feelings, you need to know that it is possible to cope with these feelings differently. You do not have to adapt these negative coping mechanisms to deal with your problems, with self-control and will-power, you will be able to give away with these methods of coping.

What is Self-Harm?

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People usually adopt different methods of self-harm to cope with troubling feelings and episodes. Self-harming generally takes the form of cutting, pain inducing behaviors, or burning. The level of intensity to which people self-harm depends upon individuals; however minor or major someone’s ability to cause harm to themselves be, the seriousness about the situation should never be neglected.

Methods of self-harm is adopted by individuals to cope with underlying distressing tensions and feelings, this might give temporary relief to them, but in the long run it can cause severe damage to their mental well-being. We must understand that self-harm could be someone’s normal way of dealing with their own problems, thus it is important that we don’t shame them anyway. It is essential to be empathetic, and we must try to talk to them as soon as possible because learning a new coping strategy could be a very difficult task for many people. Therefore, we should not delay bringing up the discussion about it, and try to offer help to them at the earliest.

Why do people Self-Harm?

Why do people self-harm? You asked Google – here's the answer | Jay Watts |  Opinion | The Guardian

We deal with our problems in our own way, all of us adopt different methods of coping which we think help us in the best ways possible. Some of us might be expressive about our distressful thoughts and upsetting feeling to others; therefore, many try to talk to their friends or family to relieve their tensions. But, being explicit about their problems is not easy for everyone, that’s why, many people adapt unhealthy coping mechanisms, which might help them for the time being, but those coping strategies could turn out to be a serious threat to their peaceful well-being in the long run.

When people do not speak about their troublesome thoughts to others and try to repress it, those feelings starts building up within them and it becomes difficult to let them go. Thus, most of them try to turn this on themselves by harming or sabotaging themselves. They usually self-harm when they are going through a depressive episode, or if they are angry about something. The urge to hurt themselves starts getting stronger by time, therefore, it is necessary to stop these coping methods as soon as possible.

Individual reasons and triggers that led them to start self-harming can vary from each other. But, we have some of the common reasons that young people reported as triggers- bullying, depression, toxic home environment, problems with friends, low self-esteem, major transitions and difficulty to adapt, anxiety, alcohol and drug abuse.

Getting Help


If you’re self-harming, then you must consider talking to someone about it. We know asking for help is difficult at times, but it is going to make things simpler for you in many ways. Talking to someone and asking for help is a sign of courage and not weakness, it often give us a huge relief after finally sharing a detail about ourselves we wanted to since a long time.

If you are thinking who can you discuss your problem with, don’t worry there are a lot of people who willing to help you and support you. Always remember that it is necessary to tell someone you trust and feel comfortable with. You can discuss this with your friends or family, a teacher you trust, or you could contact people through helpline numbers. If you think that speaking about it is too difficult, you can also convey your message to people by writing your thoughts down.

There are a lot of therapy sessions, like cognitive behavioral therapies and psychotherapies available which can help you adapt healthy coping strategies, and also guide you how to resolve your underlying conflicts and tensions.

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